Ways Women can Disconnect with Themselves
How to Self-Reflect and Reconnect,
Strengthening the Foundation of their Lives
- Being everywhere but here.
Presence is that thing we do not often use even though it is always available to us. Worry, fear, and our vision on the future tends to disconnect us from the experience we are having right now. Return as often as you can by simply saying, “this moment.”
- Our relationship to our body.
Our bodies are beautiful; sacred entities. Many of us are dissociated with our bodies or associated only in a painful way. We often feel as if our bodies are letting us down. However, our minds are more likely letting our bodies down by devaluing or obsessing over our bodies. Embodiment is the connection. Live within your body.
- Being a miser with sleep.
Sleeping in a daily gift of restoration and our time of dreams. Our sleeping hours must be sacred, giving ourselves what we need to wake rested each morning.
- Making food a fool.
We rush food. We under eat. We over-stuff. We follow the “best way” to eat. Food is very simply our fuel. When we fill our gas takes we do not put $1.00 of gas in our tanks because we are worried the car will be too heavy or we do not keep filling our tanks until the gas flower over because we are trying to soothe and distract the car from its feelings. Our bodies cannot be compared to a car. We are far more complex than a vehicle! We have spirit, emotions, and a worth that cannot be destroyed. Food is fuel to help our bodies both survive and thrive. The food our body requests may to look like the diet we think need to eat. It looks like giving our bodies what they need. It looks like hydrating completely. It looks like eating what we need to feel satisfied. And, it looks like leaving rigid, strict diet behind.
- Missing the importance of menstruation.
Our menstrual cycles are incredible revealers of our health, our moods, and our burdens. Our relationship with menstruation can reveal our relationship with our bodies. Our cycles are cyclical gifts to help us rest, restore, and release each month. Learning to appreciate this “mini-rhythm” of nature that lives inside of us can do wonders for connecting us to ourselves.
- Trying to prove our worth.
Worth is inherent. There is no one to prove anything to. We really are enough exactly as we are.
- Prioritizing things that are not important to us.
Walk through your day in your mind. Our days are often filled so much with the necessaries and ‘housekeepings’ of life; so much that we do not get to the things that are most important to us. Start your days with what is most important, and you will often store up excess energy that can easily and lovingly guide you through your day as you perform the more mundane tasks of life.
- Not being smart with our smartphones.
We have become addicted to these “mini computers”! We never leave them at home, never turn them off, and sleep with them next to our beds. For many people, their smartphone is the very first thing and the very last thing they look at each day. We are so fascinated with other people’s lives that we forget to connect with our own. What is the first area to “smarten up”? No phones in your bedroom!
- Being way too hard on ourselves.
For one day, watch and observe how many times we tell ourselves we could have done something better, faster, wiser, sooner, or we should have done something. You are good enough. Refer to my previous blog post about Petra Kolber’s Perfectionism Detox.
- Not giving ourselves what we need.
For many women, we come last. We meet the needs of everyone else and if we have anything left over, we guiltily share it with ourselves; not a good equation. What is one thing you will give yourself today? Do it first.
- Interrupting intuition.
Let go. Let go. Let go. Controlling (what we cannot control) cuts off the part of ourselves that communicates with our inner knowledge, and ‘gut feeling.’
- Not following the rhythms of nature.
As women, we are intricately connected to the rhythms of nature. Spending time outdoors is critical to ground us and connect us with the vastness of our existence. Get outside to connect with the messages nature will give you and the energy nature will provide you.
- People pleasing.
Look at your calendar and to-do list for the week and notice how many items listed please someone else. Make adjustments and full those appointments with a few items to please yourself.
The biggest and most challenging disconnection we battle! It is soul-sucking, anxiety-inducing, and the quickest way to live a life “half-assed.” Read my previous blog post about how to “detox” and overcome this challenge.
- Staying too safe.
We become so comfortable with our life: routine, rituals, and habits. We deeply settle into its safety. As a result, we can stunt and drown our dreams, which can be the things we are urging to do if we connect with ourselves. What is one way you will step outside of your comfort zone today?
- Seeking balance.
Balance is a fallacy. We cannot find it because it does not exist in the sense that we are seeking it. We cannot give an equal amount of time to all the things that are important to us. Life is much more complex and beautiful. We must live life so fully that giving equally to it all does not matter because we give so completely to what matters at the present moment.
- Limiting joy.
Many of us are not making time for the things that most light us up. Why does joy get pushed to the bottom of the list? Because we are so disconnected with ourselves we do not realize the value, the importance and sacredness of ourselves, and how necessary joy truly is to our wellbeing.
Storm, F. (2014). 18 ways women are disconnected from themselves. Elephant Journal. doi: https://robinluthi.com/2017/05/15/midweek-motivation/ Accessed on June 18, 2017.